Vases are for flowers…

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“And yet, Oh LORD, you are our Father. We are the clay, and you are the potter…”
Isaiah 64:8 (NTL)

“Finding our purpose”, a phrase used so often by so many of us who have the desire to know exactly what it is we’re on this earth for. I don’t know about you, but it seems that with each New Year, the purpose needs to be even more clearly defined to me – yes, I get that we are a couple of months in the year now, but some of us are still searching. So bear with us.

It was not too long ago during my morning quiet time that I had a heart to heart with God about my purpose. Why am I here? Surely there’s got to be more to my life than just getting through the day, only for the process to be repeated again the very next one, and the next one, and the next one…you get the picture. Don’t get me wrong, I am grateful for each day that I’m blessed with; however, I’m thirty five, and although I think I’m doing pretty ok for myself; I sometimes get moments when I feel like I’m just wandering through this thing called life. Yes I have goals, and I work hard towards reaching them, nevertheless I truly believe that there’s more that I’m called to do in this life. With that being said, so on this particular morning, my desperation to hear from God about my purpose was so intense. I remember even asking Him for at the very least, a hint, or just a step in the direction I should take. After many futile attempts in trying to find and define my purpose on my own, I figured going to God with it was probably my best bet at getting some sort of light at the end of the tunnel, which wasn’t a train…

The passage I was reading didn’t necessarily have anything to do with me trying to find my purpose (I say this with a whole lot of caution, as in itself, the entire Bible is filled with God’s gentle nudges of what the grandest purpose for our lives is), yet the Holy Spirit, in His loving nature, literally dropped an impression in my heart – Psalm 139:16 and a vase. Weird, I know! This was my exact thought. I stopped reading for a bit, trying to make sense of the vase. The verse, yeah it kind of made sense – all the days ordained for me were written by God even before one of the came to be. Great stuff! This is quite reassuring really, knowing that not a single thing about my life happens by chance. Nothing is coincidental, that there is a purpose and a plan for my life. Awesome! However, I was still confused about the vase, and could not for the life of me connect the dots; “What does a vase have to do with my purpose”? As I was attempting to piece it all together, a few verses about ‘The Potter and the Clay’ came flooding to my head, and as I went through them, Jeremiah 18:1-9 ministered to me greatly. I read and re-read this passage, and it finally struck me; it’s only the potter who knows the reason for which a vessel is created.

When a potter makes a vase, its primary purpose would be for it to display flowers. And while a vase can be used for many things, such as holding water (okay, maybe this is a bit of a stretch, but y’all know what other use you have for vases either than its main one) or even be put on display as an ornament, it doesn’t take away from its primary purpose – displaying beautiful flower arrangements. This is the same with us, we can do so many things with our lives that have both value and meaning, but if we are not doing that which God, our Potter, has created us to do, then we aren’t living out the purpose we were created for. We often try to define purpose for ourselves; but the truth is, only God can do that. And no matter how many times we may mess up while trying to figure it out, God can take those messy pieces and put them back together and still give us something to work with. We don’t find our purpose, we were created with and for it, and it is only wise that when we get to the point of desiring to know what it is, we go back to God for the answer, and sure enough, He will direct us. It is not so much that we need to find our purpose, but allow God to reveal His one for our lives to us and then walk it out.

Do I have the exact blueprint of the purpose God has created me for? No. Not quite the answer that many may have been hoping to get; but hearing and seeing Him direct my path on a day to day basis, I’ve become less anxious about what the big picture is; because I trust that as I remain obedient to His guidance, He will continue to reveal what I need to know, as and when I need to know it.

So although vases can be used for various things, I desire to be one that’s used to display beautiful flowers, exactly as the Potter had intended. As such, I could continue going rogue in trying to find my purpose, or I could just surrender to the one God created me for. I choose the latter!

Blessings,

Ntao

Depleted!!!

The Relentless Love of God | Gods love, Worship songs lyrics, Relentless

It doesn’t matter who you are or where you come from, but I can’t think of any other word that feels like a kick in the gut and a stab in the heart, much like “Depleted”!

More than just singing songs and quoting verses about trusting God, I’ve always wondered what doing it practically looks like; especially in a world where so much of what we want and need is at our disposal. Don’t we at times fall into the trap of thinking that while we know that we love God, and perhaps even believe that we trust Him completely, the reality is that we probably trust the resources He provides us with, more than we do Him?

I’ve been tremendously blessed to work for a company that has one of the best medical aid plans in the country – they (my employer) may get a few things wrong; but here, they hit it out of the ballpark. And so if you really know me, you’ll know that this is my bragging point when in conversations with friends and family about our different places of employ. Like, I hit the jackpot y’all!! I don’t need to remind anyone of the kind of year 2020 has been – it’s affected almost, if not every area of our lives in some way or another.  With my health not being at its optimum best, I found myself in my GP’s rooms a lot more than I care to count; not to mention the numerous trips to my therapist as well. Yes, even that, I had been grappling with anxiety and depression too; that medical aid was hard at work! So a few weeks ago, after unsuccessfully trying to manage a rather stubborn headache on my own for about three weeks, I decided to pay my GP a visit once again. As usual, I produced my medical aid card, then went on ahead to the consultation room and had my Doc examine me; as I was about to leave, she uttered words I hadn’t anticipated to hear; put in what I found to be the most polite way anyone in that kind of situation could, almost as if too afraid to say them even, “Uhm, it seems as if the funds in your medical aid have been depleted”. It took me a few seconds to pick my bottom jaw up from the ground…

Have you ever felt like your face was being plastered with wet cement which dried up quickly, and then started cracking? Yup, that’s the feeling I got right in that moment. Embarrassment gobbled me up for a second, as I reached for my purse to make the payment. Very soon after the whole incident, in hysterics on a call with my sister, I told her of what had just happened – I was not only sad, but given my health, I was also very worried about what would happen to me should I, heaven forbid, fall ill again before the year ended. With no real choice, I concluded should worse come to worst, I would just have to tough it out…

As I was driving home and thinking about everything, the Holy Spirit reminded me of something too sweet to ignore, even though I hadn’t paid much attention to it; something that has never, and will never, ever be depleted, and that is the love of our heavenly Father; not only this incredible love, but everything else that comes with it; like His healing power. A smile formed on my face and laughter burst out of my mouth as if it had been trapped, more from shame than anything, at the thought of how much I didn’t really trust the only One who has on every occasion been trustworthy; as much as I have sung about it.

How many times have we found ourselves placing our trust in the things God has provided us with? Him who is in fact our Source!? Our jobs, medical aids, and even the very doctors we go to when bodies are afflicted are awesome to have around; trust me, I know how great a feeling it is to have these things, but surely we can’t trust them so much that we forget that at the end of it all, it is God who has us, and as our Great Physician, He heals us. The Bible, our manual for life, clearly states in Isaiah 53:5, “that by the stripes of Jesus Christ, we are healed”. He does the work, and nothing is beyond His healing power. He provides for us, for “He shall supply all our needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus”, Philippians 4:19. What’s marvelous about God’s supply, for whatever it is that we may be in need of, is that we can rest easy in the knowledge that it never runs out. God’s supply will never be depleted, and we can never fear that we’ve gone to Him too many times for our needs. In fact, He desires for us to run to Him first, rather than making Him our last resort.

One of my favourite songs to sing in recent times is Relentless Love. It reminds me of how much God loves us. It is this relentless, limitless love of His that manifests in so many different ways, as according to our needs, that we ought to rely on. It is His Word when He tells us that He is our ”Good Shepard, and we shall not be in lack”,  Psalm 23, that we should trust, more than any other thing that may appear to be our safety net when we hit some of life’s hurdles.  

As I continue to walk this journey of knowing more of who God is, may I learn to trust Him in the big, the small and everything in between; and just take Him at His Word. After all, He is just a prayer away!

Blessings,

Ntao